I dreamt that I found myself in my exboyfriend's apartment. It has been years since I have seen him, around 10 years... He wasn't there, but I had vague memories of the evening before. Did I get drunk and visit? I didn't know where he lived, so he had to have asked me over. I didn't even know his number. I was a bit in a panic. I was looking for my phone so I could leave the scene. I remembered something from the night before or very early that morning, him looking for his wallet. I started scrambling through blankets, counter tops, piles for my shoes, keys, phone and found nothing. I was exhausted and didn't feel well, so I went back to sleep, waking up here and there, but too groggy to do anything. Finally it was evening and I woke up with a jolt. I remembered I had wanted to get out of there before he returned. I started looking again and found my keys. I thought maybe I had left my phone in my car. I went out into the parking lot and started clicking my unlock button hoping to hear the beep beep of my car. Nothing... then I thought I had heard something but then saw people were coming so went and hid in the bushes. I didn't find my car and rand back into his place and his wife was already there and two children. I was stuck. I had put on a large hoodie of MT's and just sat there with an uncomfortable guilty face. She greeted me with a warm smile and said hello. I said how happy I was for them. And then MT came behind me and was pleading with me to let them help me. I don't know why I needed help, but in the dream I was lacking something. I was refusing.. help hurt somehow. It said I was bad, not good, not capable... He was crying and pleading now... almost manic as if he was trying to reason with a crazy person ... me... to let them help me.
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