The A Team

 I dreamt that I was part of a team that was to protect. We were either military or some independent unit.  We were in an area that a unique storm was brewing. The wind would come in and almost undetectably, blow in fast small circles parallel to the ground and knock out whole fields at the base of plants. It was almost as if all of the plant matter was a large piece of paper that would blow away all at once. We were in an empty building watching and noticed that a very large dead tree blew over as well and sparked. Out unit had some cool new toys. One had a tractor of sorts that could articulate and perform delicate actions. One of our guys went missing - another of our guys had a crush on him and was searching for him, but he was fine. I found his shirt under a blanket (our day uniforms included Hawaiian shirts). His crush-er had folded it for him. I showed it to him and he rolled his eyes. He was very anal and I was thinking he would have appreciated it. Also stylish, he would order his own custom Hawaiian shirts to fit his look.  A

At the same time, this was happening, a mother was giving birth. Her young very emotional son was concerned about his mother and awaiting his new baby brother. He was there for the birth and at the end was more exhausted from the experience than she was. 

model shots

 I dreamt that I was in line with other models to get photo shots. It was dusk and we were all nude. I felt a bit odd in that my stomach was protruding like a balloon. I said they were taking shots as if I was pregnant. and let it go. I looked down and my stomach moved.. I saw feet and hands moving in my skin. I didn't know how it happened. I was half happy half not. I told someone passing that it could be aborted as if this wasn't meant to be. Then part of me was excited to have a little baby. 

Linen

I dreamt that TMB and I started a company. I'm not sure if it was fabrics or clothing, but it was a company based on work life balance. The building was surrounded by grounds and had a large park in the middle. People could go for walks on the paths to let their mind  have a break, or come with new ideas. There was a sense of play in the atmosphere, but also a sense that people cared about each other, the work and thriving as a whole. The people were all dressed in linen and I think that was the name of our company as well. It felt at one point like I was watching a small video about the company with employees laughing and splashing water at each other in the park. It was a bit cheesy as far as an advert goes, but the idea was nice. 

my lemon

I dreamt a a little baby girl was crying from just waking up. I went to pick her up hoping that I could do something to comfort her and she immediately giggled.

Then I'm with Gene Kelly. We are a couple and about to go to the museum, but he has to prepare first and shower.

We are in the living room, light yellowy marble on the floor, white furniture, and across there room there is a small hallway with a woman looking at herself in a mirror. In the living area before her, there is a painting on an easel. Gene looks to me and with a sparkle in his eye, he says watch and nods in the direction of the painting and the woman.   A piece of abstract art, like a person made of brown, black, gold and white polygons peels off the painting and start walking towards the woman. Gene watches in anticipation for her reaction of surprise.  It reaches out a line of an arm and taps her on the shoulder. She exclaims and laughs and turns to look at us. I'm waiting to see her face, but as she turns her face is polygons as well. But I am her and he is the polygon and we are both the humans and the abstract.. I think how fun to be both and play before the museum.

Then I see a classic painting or a bowl of mussels and clams, very large and beautiful blue and white shells. I start to prepare them and go to pick them up and the shells are soft like painted on canvas. I tell him how nice they are and start putting them on plate. He says.. but I like my lemon. I half ignore because it is easy enough and he can get the lemon. I continue to say how nice ...and he says but ...and I follow.. "I like my lemon." I turn to see he has it cut already and I have little forks. I turn back to the shell and say "I guess i'll have to get my own lemon," and I turn and he has just finished putting lemon on both of ours... we kiss.

blackberry candy

I dreamt that I was in a hummer type car. We were trying to get away from some people.
A Ferrari and two vans. Oddly the hummer seemed like a tight fit in the back where I was to sit and buckle up. I told them no way was I going to sit back there.  They let me move to the front and take the driver's seat which was much roomier. The crew I was with were all fun, adventurous and nice people.  There was a kitchen under the back part of the hummer, kind of like the space of a tank. One of the fellas had just cooked up some blackberry candy. He brought up a cutting board with some broken chunks of lavender and offered it up to me. I normally wouldn't eat the sugar, but I said ok to bond.

play practice

I dreamt that I was with some people that were practicing for a play. I'm not sure if I was part of it, costumes/props/acting... but I knew I was supposed to be there as I didn't feel out of place. Although, I did feel like an observer.  I was watching people milling about below the stage and the sides working on things. The lead actor and actress were chatting and laughing. She was an actress from a while back, now in her late 60s or early 70s. She was still attractive, dark haired (well most likely with the help of a salon) and kept her petite figure. As I was watching, a tv screen kept bopping in and out of my vision. It was showing a clip of actors who had passed, one image fading into another with the year of 2009 fading in and out like a watermark. It would show a few male actors and then I would be watching play practice again. I wanted to see the total list. I was watching the actors again. There was a prop that was a boat. They were to sit in it and it was mechanized to tilt forward and backward as if floating over waves. He went to sit in the back... again the tv screen turned up.. showing the same list of actors that had passed with the year 2009.  I was back watching the actors and he was all situated in the boat on the back bench. She then got in to sit on the bench in front of him and they practiced with the movement ... and water, getting splashed with it.  I was thinking crazy these days all of the contraptions and props they use in plays and pondering whether simpler was better for a stage. I refocused on the actress and was a bit concerned due to her age... the movements of the boat were not gentle, and although she was in good shape, she still had the bones of an older woman. At one point she held her arms straight up and slid off the back of the bench to lean back on his, smiling the whole time. She seemed just fine,

I looked up 2009 ... and she did look a bit like this:
http://www.oldpasadena.org/blog/wp-content//2009/12/jenniferjones.jpg

Jennifer Jones - Actress (1919 - 2009)

eventual path

I dreamt that I was on a train or tram on my way to a specific location. It was in Germany, Austria or Belgium, .. and knew I would pass by cute villages, rivers and flowers as it was spring. I had a specific place to go, but had never been there and the description was vague. I was to see a bridge, I envisioned with baskets of flowers hanging from it. Then once across the bridge, there would be a path to the left and an house at the end of that path.

I felt like I was on the train with others I knew... or at least was talking to. Or maybe I was just talking to myself, but I saw places that seemed like the right bridge or path, but they just didn't feel right.  I thought, what if that was the one... and I missed it, but I comforted myself in knowing that there would be another opportunity.

I got off at a stop finally and funnily, I saw no bridge or path, but it just felt right. I walked down along the road towards the town and met nice people, and there it was. The bridge and I could see the path to the left right across from it.

Then I was with TMB and SG from work. They were walking along looking at little food stands. We were all chatting. SG said... "so the other day, I gathered up a list of news stations, web sites, reporters and so on.. You know my brother went missing a month ago.  So I sent the list to my family letting them know I would contact them soon and see which ones would be willing to air the story. I cc:'d my brother on it just in case anyone was checking his email."  He paused and was expressionless, in a dry sort of way. He continued, "I got a response back... it was from my missing brother. He wrote, "I think it would have taken me more than a month to create that list." It turns out when I dropped him at the airport, I had sent him with his baggage, but his passport was in my briefcase. He has been stuck at an airport for a month and they didn't allow him to contact anyone."

petrified 1

I dreamt that I was sleeping on my side, then felt something or someone pressed up against my back... I couldn't move.

conversations

I dreamt that I was at a movie theater. It seemed to be a nice one. The chairs were nice and had wooden arms and lots of space. I was sitting next to Bill Murray... although I'm not sure he was really him... the actor. More him had he not been the actor. I was in a fluffy white robe, which didn't seem strange and he was dressed normal. We both had a beverage and he had a cigar he was puffing on. I'm pretty sure we were on a date, because I had the feeling he had asked me, and that he had liked me, but as soon as we sat down, he seemed to ignore me. He would respond to questions... but wouldn't turn in my direction what so ever. I relaxed my arm for a moment and it touched his leg. I liked the feeling for a moment, but was now self conscious... I didn't want him to think I was hitting on him so I put it back on my lap.

I decided to get up and move to a table. I didn't need to sit through an awkward night. An older guy was there telling me about a car his uncle was going to give him. He was very excited as it was new, seemed to be able to drive on its own and self charge. It was smaller and seemed to be a bit of an economy car, but still nice.  Then there was another fella that started talking. He was K, a guy I work with. He was explaining something about work and then started drawing plans on the table. I quickly got a napkin and water to see if it would come off ok and it did, so I let him continue drawing.

The older guy started talking again. This time he won a new car and it was a luxury one. I'm thinking... but you just got a new car... what are you going to do with two? but just shrugged my shoulders.

easy life

I dreamt that I was in jail.  It seemed less like a jail and more like a like a ordained community.  We were still treated like people of society, but we had rules to follow and we all seemed to follow them to a T.  We had classes to take, times to be here and there. I heard some people talking. Bill Murry was in jail too with us. I guess he would get in trouble by choice because he wanted to return. He found life easier in jail, less to think about.  His jail mates would do his laundry, get him food, treated him like a god.

freedom

I dreamt that I had two boys, 2 and 4 years old.  I had a partner that I wanted nothing to do with... It actually felt worse than a prison, because I had made the choice to begin it all.  I felt obligated to my choice. But I felt like I would rather have death than be in that relationship. The person wasn't so horrible, but I couldn't be there anymore. Then there were the children... I initially felt like he  couldn't take them.. they should be mine.  I didn't want to live without them, I loved them so much. But I didn't want his influence on them ...  Then I recognized the life I would have, visitation, decisions, coordinating and I felt angst and trapped. I didn't want this life. I didn't want to have to be tied to him, to schedules, to ...   My mother had me over to talk about things... I knew where it was going... a list of everything I "should" do... I didn't want any of it. It was a nightmare. 

discomfort

I dreamt that a older fella was laying in my bed in a suit. He seemed regal, mustache, overcoat, cain.  It was a studio apartment, so the bed was more like a piece of furniture. That part wasn't odd. I noticed blood coming from his ear. It was about to go all over my white duvet. I felt a moment of tension, then let it go. It could be cleaned or replaced. What this man was going through was more... I think he was at the end and knew it. I could feel his mind running through his memories and letting go.

delivery

I dreamt that I was going to do a skit type thing with friend. She asked what kind of hair she thought we should have in these roles. I told her that I saw her character with straight hair brown hair and straight bangs.  She said she had to use her own hair so, it would have to just be good enough. But her hair was straight with the bangs, but black when I was thinking something a little more dowdy.
My character was to be blond with a similar cut. We had uniforms like catholic school but the skirts were a bit more flouncy. What was the film we were doing? The film guy came in and we were to practice our parts. I don't remember much but at one point she had her clothes off and she was standing near a rack of clothes on the wall as if at a nice boutique. He felt a bit creepy to me. I felt unease as if I had just put myself in a not so safe situation.

Then I had a delivery. It was a box wrapped in brown paper. It had the address 3030 on it. I bicycled down by this almost all black building. I looked down at the address on the box and was impressed that I could hold such a large box while riding. I coasted my bike to the side of the building. There were three Asian guys sitting on the grass with their bikes. I went to knock on a door as if it was the one, although there were no addresses near any of the doors. The guys looked at me and said "No one will open the doors," as if my exercise of knocking was futile. "And besides.... that one is 1515." I knew it was as I had delivered there sometime in the past. I asked them if they knew were 3030 was, and they pointed in a direction to the front of the building. The building went in and out with more doors and I followed along... I saw more of the absence of addresses. At one point I just knew somehow that I had walked by 6060, and if I kept going I would find 3030. I was drawn to its entrance. I wanted to walk away maybe, but they saw me and I felt drawn in. I thought at least they could help me. They were a couple of ladies, maybe in their 50's or older, or maybe not. They didn't take care of their appearances which made them look a bit more worn.

I told them about my package for 3030 and they looked at each other and then looked at me. A look of should we tell her? They also said that no one would open the doors. We were in a room that was a bit large.. kind of like a ballroom, but more like a grange hall with old linoleum, paneled walls, and fluorescent lighting. The place was a mess with folding tables topped with open boxes and piles here and there. They offered for me to sit down. I saw there were quite a few people in the room that were milling about. It seems the two women were in charge at that moment, but who were the other people? I noticed two men that were in what looked like giant black bags made out of plastic tarp fabric reinforced with a weave of threads. I saw another man with googly eyes kind of milling about with no direction and then it hit... this was some sort of "home" for mentally ill. The ladies confirmed. I asked about the men in bags and they said that they had committed murders or had violent tendencies.

The ladies had been talking about needing entertainment or a movie for someone. I said that I had a film on my phone they could watch, the skit we just had performed. I then paused and told them about the naked scene, explaining it wasn't meant to be sexy, but maybe too much in this environment.  They agreed. They asked me instead if I would like to volunteer with something for their group, as if I wanted to do something for them?? She started running off ideas and I heard sorting and stuffing envelopes so I volunteered for that one. It sounded mindless and easy. I walked with her to the room's entrance and she told me to wait there. I sat in a chair facing the room right next to the opening in a hard chair upholstered with brown vinyl. A man in one of those bags was sitting right next to me and another was standing in front of me facing me swaying from foot to foot trying to get eye contact. I knee jerkily avoided his eyes, but part of me really wanted to look. Part of me wanted to get to know all of them. What made them tick, was there anything left? I was more drawn to the ones in the bags. They hadn't checked out yet. They were still intense and alive.

connected

I dreamt that I was traveling all over Germany. I had been several times, but was going again. In my mind I was justifying the trip... and partly verbally to others, that at least on this trip I was seeing new things. All of the touristy things I usually don't see.  We were specifically touring sites that were monuments, museums, huge statues... They were actually quite amazing to take in and I was glad to be there and to be led with the others, which were a group that were touring together.  I felt closer to some of them, as if old friends, and others I barely knew, but we all shared a common interest in travel, and learning and seeing new things.

I walked out ahead with an older fella. We politely held conversation and moved forward as we were both done looking at the previous points of interest. I thought I hoped that the rest took the route that we had thought was the obvious next path, or we would have lost them.

I saw them trickle to the next site bit by bit, one person in particular that I was happy to see. I didn't feel like we were seeing each other formally, but there was a definite bond that came from the center of me. He saw me and looked down, then looked back up with a warm grin. Full communication of how we felt across a room.

We walked back to the place we were staying. It seemed to be a large home, warm, cozy, imperfect. Everyone was putting their bags down, hanging up coats... plopping where ever looked good to sit. I saw the bag of groceries landed in the kitchen and we were all ready to eat. I started cutting the bread.  One couple had a baby. I saw my friend look at it in admiration. I could almost see his heart grow. He walked over to me and in a soft voiced said, "why don't we have babies together?"  I was warmed and also not registering this as a real statement. I replied .."awww," almost patronizingly, but thank god not too much. Or rather, he knew how I felt, and that I appreciated his feelings, and just loved that he thought of us doing anything together.

4 headed poodle

I dreamt that I was trying to use a camera. This camera was a little different thought. It was semi-transparent white plastic, maybe 4x6x.5.  There was one bit that stuck out at the top which looked like a clear lens where you look through to frame your photo.  I noticed when I looked through it, it was all blurry. Maybe I was looking through the wrong side, so I turned it around, but that felt off and still blurry.  Maybe I didn't know how to use it, or maybe it was broken.

I looked to my friends who looked at me with faces of "umm no it works..."  So I tried my left eye and I could see much more clearly. It wasn't the camera, it was my vision. I had never had my eyes checked in my adult life. I had always had good vision.  I guess it was time for an eye check.

I knew where was a well touted place called Visage. It was expensive, the owner was a bit snooty maybe, but I would be happy. There was also another place owned by a woman with short black hair, middle aged, a bit not nice.  I just happened be standing right next to that one.

It seems my impatience won over my love for  satisfaction and I went to inquire about an exam. I wa in a showroom of glass frames and I saw her come out of an office. She seemed pleasant enough and I told her my situation. She stated the obvious, that it would be an good idea for a checkup. I looked past her to her office and saw that she had dogs. She said "oh yes, they come with me every day."  There was a 4 headed poodle and a couple of other older dogs. She said "They are frail-ish but nice. Sometimes my patients get uneasy, especially during surgery.  It would be a tragedy if a dog barked and caused a patient to move or for me to jump. But it hasn't happened."   (Yet... I"m thinking... )

teeth

I dreamt that I wanted my teeth fixed. I was in an old house type place, or just an more classic wood paneled office and TMB said she could do them for me. She had worked for a dentist and knew how to do it.  She started working on them and they all fell out. I oddly wasn't panicked. I knew that the office was insured and this just meant that the dentist would fix them, do a better job and now for free because they created the issue in the first place.

I left there and walked through the building. It turned out to be a very old hotel ... lots of wood, lots of green, dim lighting. It had a nice feeling. I was walking through rooms and down halls and noticed someone had some old things out. There were trinkets, pendants, old pins... then there were old war medals and pins as well. They felt like treasures.

journey

I dreamt that I was in a deserted area. I was walking through some barren areas, gravel, hills, torn down fences... I noticed a couple of people behind me.. I could feel they were either younger or less experienced than I. Either way they were looking for help and guidance. I let them come with me. This would mean more to take care of,  but seemed better some how.

We kept walking and I saw in the distance what looked like a city, possibly civilization.  I was about to descend the hill I was on, excited to speed up and get to this city. Then I found myself on the ground, as if I just woke up. We had decided to make camp there and start out the next morning. I didn't feel like it was by choice. It was still dark, and I could hear the others sleeping next to me. Then I felt something on my neck. Was it my hair being moved by the breeze?  Then I felt it again. It was a small animal... a mouse? no, a rat.. it was larger. I was in that groggy state of first awakening and couldn't seem to move. I could barely make a noise, but imagined being able to swipe it away,  but I couldn't. 

zombie

I dreamt I was in the midst of zombies.  I was in a barn and the way to kill them seemed to be hitting them with bats until they died, which took about 2 to 3 hits.

There were two stages to becoming a zombie. The first stage, you still had some sensibilities about you, but you were somewhat clumsy and maybe a bit more gullible. Then after a bit of time you become a full fledged zombie. I would try and talk demi-zombies into killing the other zombies.  I would make them think they were not zombies yet and/or that if they killed them, it would somehow help themselves. It worked for the most part. 

ledge

I dreamt that I was walking up a grassy man made hill that was in between a major road way and a high rise. I was up pretty high and climbing over railings and feeling pretty adventurous. The goal was to climb over and jump to a ledge on the building. I was to the top railing and looked over the edge and fear set in. It really wasn't that far of a jump, but the thought of everything that could go wrong .. stopped me.  My friend BlW showed up and he wanted to help me, encourage me. He went out to the ledge jumped off to show me that even if I did fall, the risk was little.

It didn't seem to help, although I appreciated his efforts. Then I saw a security guard walk up the hill... he was coming to say that I couldn't jump, it wasn't legal. I felt he was doing it so I had an out. I was relieved and disappointed at the same time. 

spicey

I dreamt I was in a restaurant with a work group? friend group?.. I needed to get in and do our lunch and get out during a lunch hour.

I didn't want to sit in the main dining area. I preferred the casualness of the bar area. So I left the group to order in there. There were a couple of guys behind the bar, a cook and the bartender.. I asked for a menu which I found was much more limited than I expected, but oh well, it was food and it would be quicker.

They handed me a sample of a meal. It was a piece of bacon cooked to a crisp, a spicy pepper and some spicy sauce. I liked all three things but wasn't sure if I could handle all of the spicy and intense flavors for a whole meal.

Part of me was self conscious about separating myself. Part of me didn't care.