ledge

I dreamt that I was walking up a grassy man made hill that was in between a major road way and a high rise. I was up pretty high and climbing over railings and feeling pretty adventurous. The goal was to climb over and jump to a ledge on the building. I was to the top railing and looked over the edge and fear set in. It really wasn't that far of a jump, but the thought of everything that could go wrong .. stopped me.  My friend BlW showed up and he wanted to help me, encourage me. He went out to the ledge jumped off to show me that even if I did fall, the risk was little.

It didn't seem to help, although I appreciated his efforts. Then I saw a security guard walk up the hill... he was coming to say that I couldn't jump, it wasn't legal. I felt he was doing it so I had an out. I was relieved and disappointed at the same time. 

shadow dying

I dreamt that I was dying. A few people in my family already had died. It was some strange sickness. It wasn't painful or scary. It just started overtaking your body, like a dark shadow. You pretty much knew when you had it and how much time you had left. My dad had already had it and the shadow had already taken half of my body. The other half of the phase went quicker, so I was telling my brother good bye. I wanted to give him a hug or something symbolic of .. hey this is it... see ya. He was preoccupied. So I figured this was it... on my way out and uneventful. I was a little disappointed... like a major milestone birthday being forgotten.

sparkly eiffel

I dreamt that I was in a room with extended family on my dad's side. People I knew, didn't know, uncomfortable familiarity. Too many people in my space wanting this or that. My nephew was there but but a bit younger than now. A baby and couldn't crawl yet. He was in pink pjs though. My high school sweetheart was in a big chair across the room and I wanted to bring the baby too him. The baby seemed so soft and warm and sweet and I wanted JK to experience it. I walked to him and they had just finished feeding him on the floor. The baby was making awkward chewing faces and his nostrils seemed to stretch as he chewed. It seemed normal and I knew once his mouth was clear, the nostrils would go back to normal size. I didn't care and picked him up mid chew. I wanted to share him. It was such a warm cozy feeling though that I don't think it was the baby. It was almost as if I was the warm cozy... and the baby was just a baby.

Then we exchanged some gifts. My dad and step-mom were openning and both received sparkly eiffel tower statues that were about a foot or so high. They seemed to like them.

...

Then I was in a home. There was an older woman there, but a real go getter. She was about to go jogging and walked down the block in her running gear. There was a picket fence she walked by and there was a coat hanging over the edge. She picked it up as if that was normal, and put it on. I wondered if she thought that was ok to leave her things on other people's fences. It didn't feel right.

...

Then I was a woman in a dream. I had a slick black hair in a pony tail and straight bangs. I was wearing a fitted top, belt and a full skirt. I looked very coiffed. I was with a man in the dream who also had dark hair. I kept being called "mommy" in the dream, but it didn't mean a mother. It meant the person you go to, a matriarch of sorts. I didn't know if I was ready for this name. Did I want to be paired with this man, these people and be in charge....

contrast

I dreamt that I was looking for table lamps and ceiling lighting. I was with my friend MB who is a designer and knew he could help me with quality and selection. I was looking at the lamps and had knee jerk reactions to ones I would normally choose... more normal taste. I realized these didn't do it for me anymore. I told him... I don't know exactly what I'm looking for... but if I were to show you the images that I pull out of magazines, they are all of extreme contrast. I'm looking for light that would go with that....

the glow

I dreamt that I was with a group of people, some men, some women. Some of the people were from my past and some from my present. Some I thought I barely knew, yet they made an impression on me and some I was involved with more deeply. We were all sitting around quite closely, draped over sofas and all a bit snuggled together. It was as though we were all talking to each other, but didn't really have to say anything. A certain look, a pat with a hand and so on, told it all. It was as though we were all telling each other that we loved and cared a lot for each other, but separately. It was nice.

Then I was on a grassy path, walking through fields. There was a tree and around it were some red flowers, some orange berries and some other colors that made it look beautiful and I wanted to stop and take a photo. I was crouching down to get a good angle and a guy came up behind me. No one I knew, almost a bit annoying for some reason. He said, you might want to focus on where the sun is shining, where the glow was. I was taking the photo in the shade.I was upset at first or my ego was, but then humbled myself. I could tell he only meant well and I would take a better photo because of it.




 

puppet

I dreamt that I was somewhere.... inside some home. There was an odd table outside made of sticks... kind of artsy. It had a little tiny mock up home on it, but enough space in front for trinkets? jewels?

There were fancy jewels set out on it... some antique. Were they mine? They felt like my responsibility.

A man was outside. He looked either homeless or sketchy. Either way, he felt sketchy. I needed to go out there. I didn't want to be obvious or offend, but I didn't need the items stolen either.

I felt like when I went out there that he wanted more than the jewels. He was wanting control.. like he wanted to hurt me.

For some reason I talked to him, and kept talking... trying to appease, trying to be polite. Why? He was a direct threat and I should have yelled, screamed, grabbed my things and ran inside. Why was I trying to spare his feelings??

Then I was walking down some old neighborhood. It was a very "nice" neighborhood, traditional, old.. hmm I felt like I "should" be there. Not that I wanted to be.. or that it was me. It just what everyone else seemed to want. I didn't fit in though. But I felt I should. It was normal, it was nice, it was secure. I ran down the side of some old ladies house.... I was intimidated by her a bit, although I didn't know her, want to know her, want to be like her... I just felt like she must know something that I didn't.

I felt uncomfortable and not in control of my own limbs

exposure

I dreamt I was in a hotel room. I had gone for some event that had to do with rodeo or horses. There were others around that I had went with in other rooms. I felt this need to hide so I could get ready. I felt that I wouldn't be given a chance to get ready or that I would be criticized for what I was doing, as I was doing it. I found a room where someone had already checked out and went in there to finish up. I was hurriedly getting ready when someone walked in. It was a maid. She asked if it was my room and I was honest and said no, but that I had been staying in another room and decided to use this one instead as I knew the person that had checked out from it. She decided she need to call authorities, so I packed up and left... the whole time feeling anxious and exposed.

Then I dreamt I was in a retail store. I think I worked there. They sold clothes. I felt very watched and although I was doing a good job, I felt under scrutiny...

Then I dreamt I was getting ready again, this time in a friend's basement where I was staying or renting to work in or?? I felt I had to get ready in hiding again. It didn't feel good. Then someone came to my door. It was a man that is an actor in Hell on Wheels, the Dutch guy. In my dream he was a hypnotist that I know (British guy). He came in and I felt uncomfortable. Why was he here? I had nothing for him. Maybe he was here for my friend. I opened the door and he said he was there to learn and experience more psychic ?? stuff. I was confused as I thought he was very scientific and not into it at all. I in the dream I was a kind of expert on it, but my friend upstairs felt she was too. Part of me wanted to just send him to her. What if he was just asking to poke fun?