cafe

I dreamt that I was in a cafe that was also sort of a high end resale shop. I was looking through the clothing, a lot of it not really my taste, but was thinking maybe I could find something. The moment actually stressed me out a bit. Why put time into something when I wasn't enjoying myself, I didn't like most of it and I could most likely find something better for less with ease.  Also, why did I go to this coffee shop? I didn't care for it too much either. The energy felt low and depressing... it was just that it was unique and I found it??

I left and for some reason ran into JLB and TMB. They were talking about the cafe that they had found (same one) and kind how great it was. Part of me felt  tension... I found it... but... really, why did I care??

lizard virus

I dreamt that I was going somewhere with someone. She was this friend, although I don't know who she is, and in the dream she seemed somewhat of a new friend, because I didn't know what she liked and didn't. We needed to turn around on a road and go in the opposite direction. When we did, we noticed the road was out, as in gone. Construction was being done and there was no way to drive through. I was driving a small cat type tractor and my friend had a car. There was a huge, maybe 4 stories or taller tractor working on the road. The man driving smiled and picked up my vehicle with the claw and picked me way up into the air. It was kind of fun to be so high, but it was also like a carnival ride. On the way down he went really fast and my stomach got that half thrill half sick feeling you do when you descend in a roller coaster. I wanted to watch as he did the same with my friend to see if she made any funny faces.  Then we were outside of a house. It felt like it was at the edge of town, as there was a gravel driveway, and an unfinished feel to the edges of the property. It was also at the edge of a ravine or hill and you could see out far. I had my laptop sitting on a stump and was working on something, when some strange software popped up on my screen. It looked like some sort of worm or virus. I picked up my laptop worried and saw that there was a lizardy gecko looking thing under it. I figured it must have been from that animal. It was normal except for the back down the middle had a wide stripe of blue that wasn't like skin or scales, but more like a strip of technical hardware and lights. It was too bad it was cute, because I wanted it gone if it was going to cause damage.

I went into the house and into my room. I had made my bed and it was covered with faux fur blankets. An Asian girl came in, one of the home dwellers, and she was friendly and seemed to want to  help me. I didn't need any and left my room for a bit. When I returned, my blankets were not laid out. They were all folded but didn't look like them. I looked closer and she had washed them, which in turn ruined them. A mix of irritation, frustration and disappointment washed through me. I explained that these can't be washed, they need to be cleaned as you would real fur at a special place. One of the blankets was a silvery blanket, which would never have bought had it not been abnormally soft. She didn't seem bothered that she hurt anything. Not maliciously... just that she did me a favor and that was that, I should be happy. While I was explaining I knew it was pointless at the same time. It wouldn't fix the blankets. She wouldn't get it either way. Just move on just move on...

Then I heard a noise in my closet. Her mother, much taller and refined looking came out with some of my clothes... more frustration burning inside me. I knew to be polite and just listen and see what would happen. She was holding an elegant nightgown in white. It was beautiful, and in the dream, a treasure of mine... that I might never where, but I loved to look at it, the delicateness of it, detailed stitching, the sheer fabric... it was more of a piece of art to me. She was also holding another favored dress of mine that was meant for a formal evening. She looked at them with a raised eye brow and asked what I called these.... mainly meaning the nightgown. I said it was a nightgown and that it was special and never worn, but I would wear it and would like to keep it nice. More than the words, the feeling behind them was strong and solid wanting her to know that I don't care what her opinion is of them, they were staying.

test notes

I dreamt I was at CK/SK's. They seemed to be doing something with their family in their home and were on their way out to some activity with friends. I was staying at their house, somewhat uninvited. I did want to stay in. I was to take care of a couple of kids. The father of the boys was teaching one of them how to train their dog. They were on either side of the dog in a hallway and that father would say "where is daddy?" to the dog... the dog would crawl forward one step and the father would give it a treat. He did this step by step and then had the son do it. I guess this would be the boy's activity while he was away.

The other dog was less trained. It was a white pit bull. The dog pooped in the house on the wood floor and I guess this was a good thing. It was not a socialized dog and this meant it felt more comfortable.

Then I dreamt I was at a school. I was learning how to do something... biology something, medical something... The other young women were practicing giving injections, but to themselves in the crook of their arms. I wasn't because I was going into the field that they were. I was mainly into research, not working with patients. I was kind of relieved, but also was wondering if I should learn how to do it anyway? would it be helpful?... I went to my bin where I could keep my books and items. My booklet was gone. It had my test and all of the notes. How was I going to study for the final. I did so well on the first test due to those notes. I thought well, recreating them would be good for studying too... I just hoped I didn't miss any information.

Then there was a white table at the end of the hall. It was an experiment I was working on and I was going to show everyone what it meant, what I discovered. I wish I remembered what it was... it seemed insteresting.

buffalo run

I dreamt that I was coming up on a stretch of road. It felt like I had driven through the small town just east of where I grew up and then was driving this odd stretch of road that went over a sort of wetland area. It was like a gateway to a different place. Not just a different town or city, but a different feeling. In my dream, the road wasn't the same. It was very very high up and not made of pavement. It was as though it was all made of dark brown rich looking earth. The street that would normally be one road together, had a deep ravine between the way east and the way west. You couldn't just do a U'y and change direction. Just approaching the road, I could see a grouping of trees in the distance south of the road. I'm not sure if it was large enough to call woods... but there were animals. I saw a huge buffalo running in the field near the trees. It seemed to be playing, not headed in any particular direction. I wanted to get a photo of it before it took off and send it to RVB. I was sure he hadn't seen a wild one before. I laid flat on my stomach to approach the edge of the road. I knew before I reached it, that it would be high and I was very scared of falling. I went to the edge and it was even higher up than I imagined. My heart was racing and in my mind I was checking the location of each part of my body and if it was on solid grounding. At the same time, I knew I needed to get a pic quick if I was going to do it.

Then I was across the road. I was with some guy I didn't know that sort of looked like Jamie Oliver. In my dream, we were in his small humble home in the living room, which had about enough space for a comfy chair, a small table and a small tv... the old box shaped kind. He was getting ready for a wedding. He was going to be the DJ, but it seemed he was in charge of other things as well. We seemed to be good friends... either that or we had a lot of mutual respect for each other and wanted to spend time together. He seemed really concerned and busy making his preparations and I was in my own world thinking of things I wanted to think about. It was nice.. neither of us needed the other to do anything, but enjoyed being in the same space... watching and being energized by each other being energized by doing what we wanted to do.

texas hair

I dreamt that I was at a motel and ran into MG. It was so nice to see him as I hadn't worked with him since 1997 or 98. We chatted like no time had passed, but it was even nicer, because there was no awkwardness of youth. We talked about random ideas, what our plans were. There was a woman standing behind him. I assumed it was his girlfriend. I was hoping he would introduce us, but he kind of pretended she wasn't there. Then he finally said he had to go and as they walked into their motel room. As she walked in, I finally saw her face. She gave me a good stare, I realized I went to high school with her. I could see in her eyes that she was aware of my realization and her eyes smiled, but not the nicest of smiles. As he went through the door he asked if we could swap info and keep in contact.

Then I was driving away. I was sort of a different person, but still me. I just looked like maybe I was a society woman from Texas, big blonde hair, lots of makeup, and so on. I got into my little... sports car and was off. I needed to check on something, I"m not sure what, before I reached my destination. It was something that benefited myself, but I'm not sure it was something good to do, but not horrible. I then was going to get back out on the road and my car had a hard time starting. I was a little worried. I never had trouble with my car.

glass stairs

I dreamt that I was going to a fancy event. I was with a foreign group though. Not foreign as in from another country, but people with different activities, ideas, values, history.  These were people maybe that I might judge. Possibly only because I don't understand them...   or compare their life and values to my own, which is probably an impossible comparison.

I was wearing something out of my comfort zone, but was fitting for their group. It was a young dress, pink, short, a bit sheer and sparkly. It didn't feel, me, but it felt right enough for the occasion that I didn't feel uncomfortable. I was with a group of women, one that I knew and I guess would consider her a closer-than-acquaintance.  Our date or guide was a young man from this life style. He knew what he was doing, where to go, who to talk to. I liked not having to think about what to do, but everything he did felt .... like a trade for something. He was polite here to move to the next square, flirty there to get a few more squares down the path.... like if he just kept doing what was needed, he could stop holding his breath finally at the end and breath. But what would he have at the end? would there be an end... ? would he spend his whole life knowing how to play the game and holding his breath?  Whatever it was, it didn't make me feel good and I didn't trust him.

We were in an elevator in the magnificent house or building that we were in, and my acquaintance/friend invited me to the next event. His face tightened and he looked at her and said that he didn't think I had the appropriate attire for that event. I could tell he didn't want me to go, for whatever reason, not necessarily personal, and I didn't think I wanted to. I didn't think I wanted to be at this event.  I could hear another person, DH making some drama. I felt I was in between two worlds and I didn't belong in either.

We reached the top of the building, there was music, lights, it was pretty... where you think you would like to be or experience if you saw photos, but no one really knew each other, cared about each other... and probably didn't even know why they were there, and wouldn't have fond memories to take with them.

I wanted to leave, there were glass stairs to get down. They were extremely slippery, as if they were covered in oil. There was a kitten on the stairs for some reason that was making it just fine. I put one foot on and kept another on sure grounding. Then decided I would sit my way down.

peppermint cat

I dreamt that I was in a room. It felt like my childhood room, but with adult colors, adult things, and adult scenarios. I was my current age and looking for shoes to wear. A man in a dark business suit, black hair, a coworker of sorts was waiting in the next room for me and talking with my mother. I needed to sign this, attend that meeting and so on. I was looking through my shoes and couldn't find a partner to the ones I wanted to wear. I realized it was because the heel needed fixing and I hadn't gotten to it yet. I looked through the rest of them. They were out of date and kind of crazy. Why had I been keeping these?  Whey did I buy them in the first place. I kind of felt relieved in having that knowing ... being decisive instead of on the fence. I felt as free from the pile as if they were already gone.  I sat on the edge of my bed to put on my shoes. A cat jumped on to the chair in front of me. It seemed to want my attention. I saw that it had a peppermint candy it its mouth, the white kind with the blue center that I think Lifesavers makes. It dropped it on my lap, which I thought was an accident, so I gave it back to the cat. It then pushed the candy at me... it wanted me to hold it. So I held it, up near the cat so it could see that I had it. Then it proceeded to rub its cheek against it, then its forehead, then the side of its body. Did it want this as perfume?  It was kind of funny to watch and to see the cat be so human like. I was laughing and telling my mom about it, but I don't think she or the man heard me. Still, it was funny.

Then I was in a room. It was kind of a sitting room, an in between room, not in the same house and possibly a completely different situation. Someone who traveled... maybe BB, had dropped off some gifts while I was away. I thought how sweet and wondered what he had left. I looked and it was a nicely shaped object like a box, but rounded... like a ball that had been somewhat flattened. I opened it up to find both halves containing an object that perfectly fit the shape. It was a solid, but a bit soft. I thought was it soap, or ...?  But after reading the instructions, I realized it was rose wine, a solid form. You would add soda water and possibly juice and it would turn into the wine. I was very interested in trying it, but I didn't want to make it and not have anyone else to share it with. There was also  box of chocolates that was left, now for me and my brother and now it also seemed that the gifts were left by my dad and not BB. They were all very fancy, some hand painted with edible colors and all having different shapes. There was a paper on top that told you which each was, but it was difficult to read, as the pic of the item was on top of the paper, and the description was on the opposite side. I tried one randomly and didn't have any luck. It was something much too sweet and chewy and I decided to toss it. I didn't try another. I didn't want to waste them and I didn't want another bad taste in my mouth.

Then I dreamt I was in a car. I was in back roads, ones I have been on before in my dream memory. It was dark, there were fields, high grass, narrow roads and I felt a bit lost. Part of that feeling wasn't good... it felt like I was going to miss something, but part of it felt good, that I was there, enjoying this environment, right here, right now, in a misty night and didn't know what would happen next.

tiny tins

I dreamt I was a view blocks down from where I needed to be. I needed to be at a house up the hill a bit, but I wasn't sure where and for some reason I needed a vehicle to get there even though it was only about 4 blocks away. A woman with dark short hair, matronly type came by with a van and said she would take me. I felt fortunate and lucky with the timing. She reminded me of women that I knew, kind but uptight... kind of parched feeling with their life "force."  We got into the car and started driving. Somehow I was also outside the car and at her house and met her daughter who was a teen with long medium brown hair and a soft presence. She seemed sweet, kind, curious and approachable. Someone that anyone would be pleasant to because she was pleasant and without barriers. Easy with with life but not in your face about it.

I was back in the van... it was brown and seemed like it was from the 70s. One of those vans with a porthole window on the side and open space in the back. Now a female couple was in the driver's seat and riding shotgun. The lady driving was roundy and had short brown hair and a makeupless face. She was nice as well. Her mate more of a sidekick, but the detailed flourishy part of the couple, while the driver was the trunk, the grounding. We were driving in the area up the hill and drove by a house that looked familiar. It was their home, and then I saw the house. It was white with black trip, two story 70s thing. I said that is it! and the roundy one's reactions were slow and the mate was preoccupied with something else, so neither saw it. Two block later she realized what I had said and they turned the car around. I was tense that we missed the house that we so easily could have stopped at, but it didn't make sense. It would take two seconds to get back to the house and it was found, so what was the big deal?

The house was right next to their house which was a medium gray brown, with a simple yard and a welcoming feel. I don't know why I had needed to find this black and white house initially and I didn't go to it after it being found. It seemed I ended up going to their home, through their garage.. and back to the outside yard, which was supposed to be the backyard, although it looked down over the hill, which was actually the direction of the front yard. It felt nice being up on a hill and looking down, no obstructions, just sky and view.
There were a lot of people in the back, all seemed to be busy with something, not necessarily productive. Some were playing with something to preoccupy themselves, others seemed to be canning under the overhang in a sort of outdoor kitchen.  They were either family or friends, but they all seemed close to each other... all connected.

The people sitting in the yard were in lawn chairs, all facing down the hill as if something was going to be viewed, an outdoor film?  I sat down on the ground facing in the same direction. There was grass near it, but also sandy earth... well mainly like a sandy beach. In my dream memory, I had been there before and had done the same thing I was about to do.. which was dig a little ... trench type thing for water to flow down.. I used my hand to make an angled line behind me and then turned 45 degrees to go perpendicular to the yard's end. Then the water started to flow, just like last time, not much... but just enough to carry sand with it and uncover things. I was noticing if I was going to bother the others with this, the trench, the water... as well as keep it out of the way of their feet so the water could do its job.

It was working. I first found tiny tins, very old. They seemed like they were for a salve or maybe tiny pills back in the victorian era. I grabbed a handful of them to take up to the ladies that were canning. I wanted them to bask in the magicalness of the found treasure, but they were not as excited as I was. I went back to find more things... some old parts of a car? an album? other miscellaneous items that were treasures to me because they told a story, they were special. 

sky plants

I dreamt that I was shopping at some sort of odd "at the moment," one time at this location sale.  I was with a coworker (DA) and we were looking at some items on racks in an old strip mall building. There was nothing glamorous about the place, cold florescent lighting, white linoleum floors that were scuffed up and dirty, metal rolling racks and workers that looks more like they were just there to unload and reload with no customer service, no place to try on things and once you buy it ... it is yours. I thought the prices would be cut to maybe 50%, but the prices were at dirt level. $40 and up items for $6 and $9 at most. Initially I wasn't going to get anything because it seemed like too much effort to find a wanted item, but at that price, I thought I should try to find something. We were both looking at slips to wear under form fitting dresses. I saw one at my size and one a bit smaller. I knew my current size wasn't where I would stay, so thought about buying the smaller one. Hmm... Then we left.

I was then outside... walking through the city which seemed interesting in that it had a unique walkable layout, with different turns and corners and sizes of buildings and parks. It was fun because I didn't have any preconceived notions about what would be around the next corner. It made it more like an adventure or looking through a new picture book. Then I was near a boat along the river and a house... I was in the house at one point and there were a couple of fluffy cats and a dog. I think that the cats fur was matted and there was something about going to a vet to get it shaved, but there was a better way that was cat friendly and you could comb it out slowly. It all seemed nice enough, good news and ideas, new ... a lot of newness.

Then I was in the boat with people and there were a couple of other boats with people in them that I was with, small boat though that could fit 2 to 4 people. I enjoyed being in the topsy turvyness of the water and the motion of the people rocking the boat. Then I realized it wasn't just the people and the water. I noticed plants floating in the water... think a large aloe vera bobbing along or something that looked like an artichoke but a little more alien. I watched as the plants would fall from the sky making a splash in the water. It was fun and exciting to see this happening until I pondered... wait... what is happening? Where are these coming from and what are they for? They were not coming from an aircraft... they were coming from some place else... like out of thin air. Aliens were coming. Maybe not today, or tomorrow, but they were setting up. Plants seemed harmless and interesting. We wouldn't kill them... they would grow and set up the environment they needed when they did land. This idea in my head seemed to spread to others ideas in their heads, because people started panicking. People were running around gathering supplies, boarding up their windows.. And either time passed quickly or the aliens decided to come right after the plants, because now they were coming. No one saw them but they could feel they were here. I was with my people... not in reality knowing any of them, but we bonded. We ran into that house that was partly that strip mall building and started closing up shop. We knew that we had to protect our group and avoid opening the windows or doors at all costs. We had enough supplies, and so we started nailing the windows closed, making rules about no lights at night and limited noises, and not to let anyone in. One of the men was getting sheetrock from the building and making sure any crack or opening would only show a person another wall. It would be a building within a building and we would be safe.

needing to change

I dreamt that I had done something wrong that had legal implications. I had been lackadaisical and let something slide. I was ignoring the seriousness of it all and it was too late. The repercussions were things I couldn't manage... I couldn't afford. I was very aware now on how I needed to change.

playing

I dreamt that I was with a guy. I guess we were together. He was tall, black hair, and dressed in dark clothing. We had a strong sense of knowing with each other, of being together and had amazing chemistry. It felt electric and cozy at the same time. He wanted to spend some time with me but knew I had to spend some time with my family. I went to the back yard. My dad was outside and there were a couple of dogs and a large fluffy cat. They were all playing. It was so cute and the animals really looked like they were having so much fun. My brother was there too and my old dog Sophie. It was very enjoyable to watch them all.

easter bunny

I dreamt that I had cash to pay back a friend, PC. I was thinking I should have recorded the amount so that I would know the correct amount. We were going to stay with this older couple. I think in Seattle, they were still very active mentally and socially and seemed like people that you wanted to spend time with. Their home had all of the same decor from years ago and an old television, the kind that was a giant piece of wood furniture. I was going to stay in the living room, while the others would sleep upstairs in the spare rooms. The sofa I had slept on before was soft, so I decided to go into the family room sofa that was firmer, although not as nice of a room. I was watching some old program on tv. PC was awake for second and then went back up to sleep. I heard people at door. There were a handful of guys dressed as Easter bunnies. They were coming to hide filled with chocolate for each person in the house. I wondered if it was okay that I saw them. One comes and asks for a kiss on the cheek,  I oblige. It was sweet. They continued to hide the eggs around the house. One looked in next room to hide mine and I can see him writing a message and his number and leaving it in my egg. He slid it under sofa. Then they left. Then HP (a guy I went to high school with) woke up and had slippers with the eggs. I say what's this? It is so early, I want to sleep. He gives each person 4 green slippers and two blue, like for bunny feet to give to each person. He says that he has always done this. Then the little boys in the house wake up. His little brothers it feels like. He is making little jokes... Saying words that rhyme, something an old man might do, and it still works on the boys and makes them laugh, I think it is so sweet.

lost wallet

I dreamt that I was walking along a sidewalk in a small town. The curbs were edged with dust and weeds and it probably wasn't the best part of town. It felt livable though and real. I looked down between some grass that was growing at the edge near the drain and saw an old dirt covered wallet. I picked it up and looked inside expected it to have been emptied already. It had the Driver's License of a friend of mine's DZ. He lived about a block away, so I popped over to his place to give it to him. For me, it was a nice excuse. I liked him and never really saw him much. It was a way to see him without it seeming that I was interested in him romantically. He was happy to see his wallet and then went on milling round doing things that he had to get done and it seemed he wanted my help. He had an old truck parked across the street that he wanted to sell. I could tell that he was iffy on selling it, I think he was attached and thought if he just did a little fixing, it would be fine. I pointed out some things about it that were a good reason to just let it go and he agreed. I also suggested he needed to clean it up a bit. It was caked with dirt and newspapers were packed in one of the windows. 

faux stones

I dreamt that I was in some sort of jewelry shop or vintage shop. I was with a woman and had her wedding ring on. She had some credit there or something or her husband had given her a certificate. She saw a stone much larger than her stone in her wedding ring. She thought it would be lovely in her setting and make it look more beautiful. The man behind the counter agreed and was helping her and replacing the stone. I saw that it was large, but also a cloudy blue. It looked more like a rough gem than a diamond, or even tumbled glass. I wondered if she was going to lose the diamond and make a mistake. I asked him what it was made of? wasn't it just a normal stone? He admitted he was. Her face looked a bit disappointed, although I'm not sure she was ready to give it up. She liked the look, the new silhouette ... she didn't want to go back to the diamond even if it was worth more. 

arnold

I dreamt that I was in bed and it was time to wake up but I was sleepy. Arnold Schwarzenegger was my coach and he came to wake me up. He was all in suit attire though, not workout. He was more like a friendly cuddly teddy bear coming to wake me up, although persistent. I laid back down at first but then he came over... it was sweet and caring ... 

money ticket

I dreamt that I was shopping in a nice store for some clothing. It was a large store.. like a Bloomingdales or something similar. There was an announcement over the intercom that I didn't quite hear, but I knew it was a national emergency. The retail staff at the mall, all very formal, seemed to be working not just for the store, or at least they were taking orders from the powers that be. They were requiring us to show them our account balances and credit ratings, it was needed by the government before we could be taken to a safe place. Something was happening, maybe not the end of the world, but something so catastrophic, that no one was safe to stay where they were. Most of the people shopping there seemed pretty wealthy. I realized that the government was not going to take those with little. I was concerned. My rating wasn't horrible, but did I have enough to make the cut?  I man next to me, good looking, nicely dressed, ... if judging a book by its cover, I wouldn't think he would care about a stranger. But he looked at me and said that he had enough money to take care of himself. He had a very fancy new car that he said he would sign over to me and that it would be plenty to cover my entrance. It was so giving. I accepted without hesitation and without any feelings of discomfort for such a nice gift. It was just a nice feeling to receive.

I went on and I was in some sort of food court. It was partially outside. I saw friends of mine and family members. They didn't know about the money requirements, they just went on their way and packed up their cars. I was getting some supplies to put in the car. I'm not sure if I could take it with me, but just in case. A waitress at a Chinese restaurant was still serving food although people were stressed and departing around her. She looked stressed and worried. I wanted to tell her to run... to not spend her last minutes doing this work. She was free now... should be free now. But I realized she would do what she would do ... what she was used to. 

candy striper

Last night I dreamt that I was on facetime with a friend of mine (DM). He was wearing an apron with candy striper fabirc and a candy striper nurse hat. He was trying to be funny.... he is a nurse. Two of his buddies were there too and saying hello. He had gone out drinking the night before with them and they were vouching that he had been a "good boy."  

polenta custard

I dreamt that I was with my ex's (MT's) parents. JK was there and so was BK. I think we were on a trip... somewhere unfamiliar and possibly in a motor home or camper of sorts. Maybe even a train. Something that moved and was limited in space and supplies. I was going to cook something for all of them and didn't quite have the recipe down, but it sounded interesting. It was a a polenta dish. It was different in that the polenta served as a crust and then there was a custard in the middle. I don't think it was supposed to be sweet, or overly savory... but more of a comfort food, something bland to go with something more with more flavor, like a Yorkshire pudding or rice.  I was doing something with eggs. Did I put the right amount in? where these whole eggs? whites out of a carton? BK was doing something with salad... she was in the other room and was interested in what I was doing, and giving me space to do it. There were other people there. Younger people, different interests than mine, still experiencing life and travel like it was a new thing, a privileged thing, and they were privileged. His parents were nice. We were getting on and it felt nice to move forward.

contrast

I dreamt that I was looking for table lamps and ceiling lighting. I was with my friend MB who is a designer and knew he could help me with quality and selection. I was looking at the lamps and had knee jerk reactions to ones I would normally choose... more normal taste. I realized these didn't do it for me anymore. I told him... I don't know exactly what I'm looking for... but if I were to show you the images that I pull out of magazines, they are all of extreme contrast. I'm looking for light that would go with that....

preview

I dreamt that I was with my dad. He is getting acupuncture but some of it is in  the brain. As in the actual needle is inside his head. He can transfer the feeling if he touches my head, which I don't want. I ask him if it is helping ...  he is not sure.

He says he wants to see this preview of a movie.. it is one I am working on, but haven't told him. He says that the preview of the preview is today. We go to look and there is a poster of an elephant. No preview until tonight. That is when my showing is. I wore a black dress at the previous one... This time I have a red one that I'm not sure. I'm carrying it in in a bag. We walk back home. I see in my mind a stage.. Sara Jessica Parker... a scene in a movie, a wave of water moves her and she lands on some cement steps outside. I replay it in my head and wonder if that hurt and how they did the scene so she wouldn't fall and hurt herself on the stairs. I also have pictures of me in tights.. but it is actually Zoe Dechanel. They are tights that are lacy that I might wear for the premier. I'm not sure they are right. They have two diamond type things sticking out the sides at the thigh. As we keep walking my dad sees that we can see the preview tonight. The tights are on me now but they are red. I'm wondering what he will think... me in these dresses, tights, premiers... feeling a little nervous a the idea. We are home. I live in the basement part of the house, trying to try on the dress without him seeing. Other women live down there... older women. The lighting is not good and I say so. They agree and want to fix it, but I' realize it is energy spent on the wrong area. Why not just move instead of focus on his place that can't be fixed.

At the same time another story is going on. I'm to redraw/paint these drawings in a book. Very intricate life like drawings. They too will be made into a movie. There is the elephant, an intricate rug, a Buddha. One page is almost comic like in that there are squares of scenes and captions, each page leading off artistically with a cloud or a cliff, instead of an outlined black box. I try and tell the man they are too detailed.. it will take me a long time if he wants this, not just a week. He doesn't quite understand.
My brother is there?  tracing paper? Someone put my pages back bent.

pink eldorado

I dreamt that I kept seeing a pink eldorado, with a man in white glasses driving it. I kept running into him.... coincidence? I was caring a bottle of Fanta, on way to JBDS's house. He was having couples over for dinner. I hadn't seen him in years. I just had a few moments with him before they all showed up. I had an old pencil box of things, rice crackers, post office bill with my check for payment, and a few other things. I realized I had no reason for being there, we had moved on from each other's lives now. I was about to leave and he had me go out back, a cul de sac that was on a hill. JBDS had tortillas in his house. A guest emptied an old bag into a large bin outside.

I leave and a guy, one of the husbands of the couples, gives me an eye, sort of communicating he acknowledged my existance and that I'm ok. I walk down the side walk. Two chubby pre teens are water fighting with plastic cups. I'm hoping they respect elders and do not splash me. I realize I left my box. I start to return and the mans yells out, "anyone want tortillias?" He gets the garbage bin full of old chips and the cul de sac neighbors go to eat them. Their left overs.

I ask the husband what is going on? He says it is to keep the peace. The neighbors are poor, sketchy... and it just is enough to keep them away and content.

I get my box and leave on my way to my home town. FG

---

kitten

I dreamt that I was outside. I felt as though I had been doing outside work... farm work, with people that had all agreed to or felt the need to do it. We were done for the day. My mother was there. I saw a kitten and I wanted to get it... my mother was in the way some how, a bit reckless and the kitten hurt itself. She ignored it, but I realized it was hurt due to it walking oddly. It had skinned its front leg. I had to get it to the vet. She wanted me to use my "address"... She said she didn't want her vet bills to go up. I guess it was like Insurance, that if you have an accident your rate goes up. I said no... it was her kitten, her property... and I didn't want to lie. I took the kitten to the vet feeling better that it would be taken care of and that it seemed calm. A man came to me and said he needed my information. He took a scanner and scanned my back lower hip. I guess I had a chip there with all of my information. He was nice. 

blue god

I dreamt that I was with an exbf BW and I was blue. Not naturally blue, but had blue makeup all over my body and face... but that this was me. He liked the color and me. Then I started feeling that although this was me, maybe I might offend others. I went to a bathhouse with a girl who fit in more than I did. At first I felt safe due to being with her, but then, with these people I didn't fit with, I felt again like I might be offensive... this color, was it a god of theirs I was offending or worse, not their religion and that was offensive. They wouldn't understand that it was me.  I held myself under water, for a very long time. I was shocked at how long I could be under for. The others didn't seem to notice this effort. I stayed under until I could wash off every trace of blue. I came back out and had accomplished it.  I was clean now, but they didn't notice me,  just the same as when I had the blue skin.  I now didn't feel comfortable and I was not myself.

bacon

I had a dream last night about Harrison Ford and Carrie Fisher. They were both the age they are now. She was kind of a comedic possible romantic interest of his, but they hadn't made it that far yet. He lived out on some hill in a rugged, remote dry area. She drove a topless Jeep up to his place and went in. I'm not sure what the conversation was, but it felt like she needed to leave in a hurry, and was anxious. She started backing down the driveway in a harried fashion, which was steep, narrow, crooked and impossible. As an outsider watching... you knew it wasn't possible. Then Harrison comes out as her wheels were spinning in the dust and just in time to see the Jeep dangling vertically over a drop that will land on boulders below. Carrie is dangling from the steering wheel and is screaming. She then screams (more an an exclamation to herself) .... "I did this for BACON!!!" 

xmas trees

I dreamt that I worked for a department store. I felt like the newbie, low man on the totem pole as I didn't really know all of the rules and I was just getting familiar with the place. I think I was partnered with anothe worker to learn the ropes, although nothing like that was said. We were getting rid of items in the stores.. I forget now what, but maybe something that was biodegradable. We went outside the building and up a dirt hill that was to the side and a bit away from the building. There were some bushes... but sparse area. The manger was complaining about that we hadn't planted trees yet. Each store was responsible for planting 4 to five Christmas trees to sell. I was thinking that wasn't very many. We had to get on that project. I looked down and I could see the stumps of previous trees. There didn't look like there would be much room for planting. Why hadn't they dug these up? Could they burn out the stump? All in all it felt sort of fun. I was outside, felt a little independent. 

printed ticket

I dreamt that I was going to a concert with some friends. I had prepared in advance and had purchased a high end ticket ahead of time. When I went to use it, I was shocked that they said my name was not on the list. I showed him my ID, told him where I had purchased it, even showed him the receipt on my iphone. He wouldn't take it. I was upset. I went to leave and go home to get it, and someone else told me that I could just print it in the lobby and it would be fine. I was upset that the man didn't give me these instructions.

lining

I dreamt that I was in Austin, TX for a rodeo. I could see that all of the people in the stands were wearing white cowboy hats. They looked much larger than cowboy hats do normally. They felt like a happy and light hearted bunch. I had a purse in my hand and I guess that I had made it. It had all different sections in it and I had put a different color of lining in each section. I noticed it didn't turn out as I had wanted. I had glued it in, and it seems you could see the glue through the fabric and it shrunk. All in all, it was still a neat design and I went to show my dad, but he didn't care.

window dress

I dreamt my brother, sister in law and step mother were going on trip. I was to or take care of cats. Sister in law was being passive aggressive saying... "Im worried if the cats will be ok."

I was busy with my own life and so was running many errands, but showed up at the large house before them. I could hear them come in the large building. It was somewhat like a castle, with turrets and lots of windows in the ceilings, it seemed to need better care. I was putting my things in the house. I noticed they cleared the bathroom cabinet for me which was nice. It was a nice mirror with wide dark wood frame that you couldn't tell opened. The counter had a wet black towel and finger nail clippings on it. I decided I would clean it all up before I put my things away.

Then I heard them come in.... I could hear them talk about me, wondering where I was etc., but not in the best light.

I looked up through the windows.. I could see the winds swirling. They arrived in the back sun room where I was where they realized I was there. CC said something about the wind. The sky was red and smokey looking to where you could see the movement.   Flocks of birds flew over but you could just see their silhouettes in the sky. It was beautiful and haunting. There were so many many birds, almost as though they were aware of something that we were not.  Then one silhouette hovered over and it looked like an old dark ages drawing of some sort of bird or dragon that was mythical. CC said "See that dress? That has been here since I was a little girl. I should probably work on getting that down." I looked, and outside on one of the very high windows was a dress, spinning and swirling against the window on its own. It was a vertical window, there is no way that dress should have been there. I could see a body scurry up the widow. It was hooded. It kept fighting to get the dress. It seems he finally succeeded because he plunged down from the window toward the ground. I could see that he had a harness and ropes. Did he get it? I wasn't quite sure. It almost seemed liked he was escaping it. Then I saw many Africans with very black skin. They had white powder or paint on parts of their bodies and faces, mainly the upper half of their head and they were all somewhat unclothed. They all had shortly cropped hair and each had a different design of the white on them. I told CC that they must be daemon hunters of sorts. 

rail end

I dreamt I worked for some sort of old time shipping company. The business near a river and a train track. I worked for them and I had needed to go with a train shipment and/or go after one that was incorrect. I was on a small train but outside, trying to catch up to the other. I liked the wind, the view of the river, it was nice. Then the train tracks came to an end over the river. The train came to a halt and the jolt threw me. I went flying through the air and my goal was to reach the other side where the tracks continued. With my all of my thoughts and flailing arms, I tried to reach it, but somewhere mid air, I knew there was no way. I was hovering at a very high point and looked down. I hadn't realized how high up I was. I felt there was no way to make a fall like this in water. As I fell I tried to think of the best position to be in... a dive? an angle to swim? Right before I hit I seemed to have caught air and dove in. I was alive and so happy I made it. I got up and realized I was in shallow water and walked to the edge. I made it back to work and the current vp of my company (BG) was there. He hadn't realized that I had left with that shipment and was worried about me. I went up to him and we leaned into each other, the right sides of our foreheads touching. He said something along the lines that he cared about me, and we turned towards each other. He gave me a touching kiss on the right cheek. It felt like warm love.

Little Girl

I dreamt that I was in a building and was a bit lost in its corridors. There was a swimming pool, other people, possibly students. It was a building of learning of sorts. I left the building and seemed to be going through the woods and ended up at a river. A little girl was with me, as well as my mother, and a friend of my mother's. The friend asked me "was your mother nice to you?"  I answered her not vindictively, not as a victim, but in a matter of fact manner, "no she wasn't." I could tell that the woman knew this, but she was giving me an opportunity to have it in the open with a witness (her), my mother and myself. It is blurred what happened next. I think the woman was gone and it seemed my mom either was too, or turned into a Native American man. Not just any, but she was the one in Last of the Mohicans that tries to kill the people at the end. He was going after the little girl. He had a very long spear, but it seemed to be all metal. I went to go stop him, but part of me felt like I ...hmmm  maybe she was supposed to die? or maybe I knew I couldn't really help her? I'm not quite sure, but the result being that I could not do this by myself. I heard noise behind me and there were a large group of other Native Americans that were running through the river over to us. They gave off a light and they were running to come help. They killed the one man and then they disappeared. The little girl and I sat on a log. I realized at that moment that she was me. I asked her if she was a ghost, although I knew she was me, I didn't know "what" she was. She smiled and said "something like that."  She said that she has been with me all along. She was very confident and sure of herself. 

glass half steps

I dreamt that I was in a foreign country. Well, it felt like the excitement of NYC, but it was more like southern Italy. I was walking through the city, on the street with buildings on one side and a park on the other. I was on my way to a class. It felt nice and new but also an uncomfortable that can come with unknown anticipation. I had this feeling before, so I knew it was the beginning of something good even if it was scary. The class I was going to take was glass blowing. I hadn't realized I had signed up for it or even had been interested. I thought kind of neat though... I'll learn something I don't know and get to be creative.

Someone was showing me one of the first projects we would be working on. It was a miniature scene, like a village or group of people, that was attached to cloth. I thought this was neat, but at the same time I wondered why the cloth wouldn't burn if you were torching a piece of glass to it? I was still looking forward to making it.

It seems the class was over and people were leaving. I was with my coworker DA. We were walking back to an apartment or maybe to get something to eat. We had to walk up some stairs. I had remembered them (dream only) as being European steps. Only half of the step was there, so either the front of your foot or the back of your foot would never rest on the step. It felt not very safe because you always had to be aware of where you were placing your feet.

We were on the top of the stairs and now descending. There was a couple there walking to the park. They had quadruplets in a stroller. The mother was able to rearrange the stroller so it could have them 2x2 or 1x4 to be less in the way. They were sweet. DA seemed irritated and it was affecting my mood. She was walking with a long leash that made me have to step around behind her. I asked her if she could pick it up? or even if I could roll it up and put it in my bag. She was thinking .. oh don't bother, but it was a bother.

Then we were in an apartment. I think we needed to meet someone there ?? not sure. It was filthy. The child there was filthy, the walls were filthy. It felt awful, but I didn't want them to feel like I was judging them, I just wanted out as soon as possible.

broken dishes

I dreamt that I was my brother was moving into my place. I think I had just moved to this place, it was an apartment in a building. I had unpacked all of my dishes and had finally made everything just so. I saw that he had boxes of kitchen items on the counters. I didn't like the ideas of mixing our things. I knew he would forget what was his and what was mine and it would be annoying when it came to splitting everything up. I was going to tell him to just leave his things, but then I decided he could have his things out and I would pack mine back up. I saw that two of my dishes had already been broken. He was about to give me some excuses of why it broke and that it was just a dish, not a big deal, when he realized he actually had broken one of his own dishes that were his nice ones. He wasn't happy. I was glad about my decision to pack up my things. 

woke up to this song in my head - Is There Something I Should Know

Please please tell me now, please please tell me now
Please please tell me now, please please tell me now

I made a break I run out yesterday tried to find my mountain hideaway
Maybe next year maybe no go
I know you're watching me every minute of the day yeah
I've seen the signs and the looks and the pictures that give your game away yeah
There's a dream that strings the road a broken glass for us to hold
And I cut so far before I had to say

Please please tell me now is there something I should know
Is there something I should say that'll make you come my way
Do you feel the same cause you don't let it show

Oh oh, oh, oh people stare and cross the road from me
oh oh, And jungle drums they all clear the way for me
Can you read my mind can you see in the snow
And firey deamons all dance when you walk through that door
Don't say you're easy on me you're about as easy as a nuclear war There's a dream that strings the road with broken glass for us to hold
And I cut so far before I had to say

Please please tell me now is there something I should know
Is there something I should say that'll make you come my way
Do you feel the same cause you don't let it show

Please please tell me now is there (please please tell me now)something I should know
Is there (please please tell me now) something I should say
That'll (please please tell me now) make you come my way
Please please tell me now can you see (please please tell me now) what makes me blow
Can you (please please tell me now) see how much I'd die
Everytime (please please tell me now) it passes by
Please please tell me now what it (please please tell me now) takes to make it show
Is there (please please tell me now) something I should know
Is there (please please tell me now) something I should know

woke up to this song in my head - The Auctioneer

There was a boy in Arkansas who wouldn't listen to his ma
When she told him that he should go to school
He'd sneak away in the afternoon, take a little walk and pretty soon
You'd find him at the local auction barn
Well he'd stand and listen carefully then pretty soon he began to see
How the auctioneer could talk so rapidly
He said, "Oh my it's do or die I've got to learn that auction cry
Gotta make my mark and be an auctioneer"

25 dollar 30 now 30 dollar 30 dollar
30 dollar 30 dollar give me a hollar 30 dollar
who will bid it at a 35 dollar bid?
35 dollar 35 35 make it 35 and a 35 make it 35 and a 35
Who will bid it at a 35 dollar bid?

As time went on he did his best and all could see he didn't jest
He practied on and then some night and day
His pappy'd find him behind the barn just a workin up an awful storm
As he tried to imitate the auctioneer
Said his pappy, "Son we just can't stand a havin' a mediocre man,
You gotta take that auction usin' our good name.
I'll send you off to auction school and then you'll be nobody's fool
You can take your place among the best"

35 dollar 40 now 40 dollar 40 dollar
40 dollar 40 dollar give me a hollar 40 dollar
Who will bid it at at a 40 dollar bid?
40 dollar 45 45 will you make it 45 give me 45 and a 45
Who will bid it at a 45 dollar bid?

So from that morning he went to school there grew a man who played it
cool
He came back home a full fledged auctioneer
And people came from miles around just to hear him make that rhythmic
sound
That filled their hearts with such a happy cheer
His fame reached out from shore to shore he had all he could do and more
He had to buy a plane to get around
Now he's the tops in all the land so let's all give that man a hand
He's the best of all the auctioneers

45 dollar 50 now 50 dollar 50 dollar
50 dollar 50 dollar give me a hollar 50 dollar
Who will bid it at a 50 dollar bill?
50 dollar 55 55 make it 55 and a 55 make it 55 and
Sold that horse for a 50 dollar bill
Hey well alright sir here we go there and what are ya' gonna give for 'em.
I have a 600 dollar down here now 10 and now 25 and now 35 and now there 50 now 60 will ya' give me 60 now 75, 75 another 85 dollars another buy 'em there.

There was a boy in Arkansas
who wouldn't listen to his ma
when she told hi-im he should go to school.
He'd sneak away in the afternoon,
take a little walk then pretty soon,
you'd find him at the local auction barn.

He'd stand and listen carefully.
Then pretty soon he began to see
how the auctioneer could talk so rapidly.
He said, "Oh my, it's do or die.
I've got to learn that auction cry.
Gotta make my mark and be an auctioneer."

25 dollar bid it now, 30 dollar 30
Will you gimmie 30 make it 30
Bid it on a 30 dollar will you gimmie 30.
Who'll bid a 30 dollar bid?
30 dollar bid it now, 35, will you gimmie 35
to make it 35 to bid at 35.
Who would a-bid it at a 35 dollar bid?

As time went on, he did his best
and all could see he didn't jest.
He practiced calling bids both night and day.
His pap would find him behind the barn
just working up an awful storm
as he tried to imitate the auctioneer.

Then his pap said, "Son, we just can't stand
to have a mediocre man
sellin' things at auction using our good name.
I'll send you off to auction school.
Then you'll be nobody's fool.
You can take your place among the best."

35 dollar bid it now a 40 dollar 40
Will you gimmie 40 make it 40
Bidin' it on a 40 dollar will you gimmie 40.
Who'll bid a 40 dollar bid?
40 dollar bid it now, 45, will you gimmie 45
to make it a 45 to bid it a 45.
Who would a-bid it at a 45 dollar bid?

So from that boy who went to school
there grew a man who played it cool
he came back home a full-fledged auctioneer.
then the people came from miles around
just to hear him make that rhythmic sound
that filled their hearts with such a happy cheer.

His fame spread out from shore to shore.
He had all he could do and more.
Had to buy a plane to get around.
Now he's the tops in all the land.
Now let's pause and give that man a hand.
He's the best of all the auctioneers.

45 dollar bid it now a 50 dollar 50
Will you gimmie 50 make it 50
Bidin' it on a 50 dollar will you gimmie 50.
Who'll bid a 50 dollar bid?
50 dollar bid it now, 55, will you gimmie 55
To make it a 55 to bid at 55.
Sold that hog for a 50 dollar bill.

Hey well all right sir, open the gate and let�'em out and walk �'em boys.
Here we come a lot number twenty-nine in. What are you gonna give for 'em
I have a 25 I ought-a get 35 and now a 50 make it 50 bid it along at 50
now 60 will ya' give me 60 now 75 and now 85 and now 95 a hundred and now 25
and now it's at 75 and a 2 and a 3 and a 4 and a 5 and a 6 now 7 now 800 dollars
and a buy 'em there.

woke up to song in head - When I Need You

When I need you
I just close my eyes and I'm with you
And all that I so wanna give you
It's only a heartbeat away

When I need love
I hold out my hands out and I touch love
I never knew there was so much love
Keeping me warm night and day

Miles and miles of empty space in between us
A telephone can't take the place of your smile
But you know I won't be travellin' forever
It's cold out, but hold out and do like I do

When I need you
I just close my eyes and I'm with you
And all that I so wanna give you, babe
It's only a heartbeat away

It's not easy when the road is your driver
Honey, that's a heavy load that we bear
But you know I won't be travellin' a lifetime
It's cold out, but hold out and do like I do

Oh I need you

When I need love
I hold out my hands out and I touch love
I never knew there was so much love
Keeping me warm night and day

When I need you
I just close my eyes
And you're right here by my side
Keepin' me warm night and day

I just hold out my hands
I just hold out my hands
And I'm with you darlin'
Yes, I'm with you darlin'

All I wanna give you
It's only a heartbeat away
Oh, I need you darlin'

niceness

I dreamt that I was at the owner's home of the company I work for. There was a big party there with lots of young ladies. Myself and the VP were upstairs. He seemed very focused on the rules of the place and making sure that the owner was not going to find anything that he was unhappy about. He was being oddly kind to me. Not the usual superficial, get-by-to-get-back nice that he usually is. He actually listened and acted like he cared how I felt. It was nice for a change. We were upstairs checking the rooms. It seems some of the party had continued up the stairs and into the master bedroom, so we were making sure everything was back in its place. The owner arrived just as we were fixing it. We couldn't find the coverlet that went over the duvet, but found something that was just as good. I figured he wouldn't notice the details... which he didn't.

games shop

I dreamt I was in another town or maybe even country. It felt unfamiliar, but it felt homey. Something about it, maybe the smallness, the safeness, the live ability of it, is what made it feel like home.  I was walking along a curving sidewalk bordered by trees and lush plants and little shops or homes here and there. I was on my way to a games shop. It was full of different board games, playing pieces, odd themed accessories. I was looking for something in-particular. I can't think now of what or why, but it had some sort of meaning to me. There was a blond young fellow behind the counter that was helping me. He was being extra attentive and nice, I assumed because he rarely had females in the shop. Some people came in which curbed my shopping experience. I didn't feel at ease looking for the item with them there. I felt exposed and didn't want them to see what meant something to me, to comment or even worse, want what I treasured. I hurried and bought something that was good enough, although not what I wanted. I had a bit of a feeling of regret in my gut. I knew this wasn't it, why did I feel the need to buy something, why didn't I just leave? I guess I felt as though I had to seem like I knew what I was doing or give back for the clerk's time or? not sure, but it was nothing from or for myself. I walked out of the store looking at my new item. It was a silver ring with a die on it.  I guess it was ok...  

stop thinking

I dreamt that I was dreaming... and in my dream I consciously quit thinking about solving a problem, and also remembered not thinking about solving a problem, and when I did that, answers would come, and then I woke up and remembered that yes, to quit thinking of solutions... because it took me away from the answers. So the idea was let it go and the answers will come....

Then I dreamt that my ex BW, said I looked haggy... like a hag.  He wasn't being horrible... and I didn't take it horrible, but I didn't want to be there either.

knees & whooping

I dreamt I had a sore knee. I looked down and it looked like a bug bite. I pushed on it as though it was a soap dispenser and stuff came out.. to the point I had to use a tissue to hold over top. I felt I was helping it heal though, although it actually started looking like a dispenser.

Then I dreamt that someone at work had whooping cough and everyone in the office was getting it.

zimbone

I dreamt that I was at the coast or ?? somewhere familiar that I visit often, but don't live there. I was staying in a hotel for something that others I knew were attending as well. It was time to return and I was going to go get my car. TB was also going home, but needed a ride with some group of people. It was a crowded car, so I suggested she go with me, which actually meant she drive another car and I drive a car, or the group drove a car and she came with me. I went to go get my car, which was newish to me. When I went to pick it up I was surprised that the back had only one wheel, as in being a one wheeled car. At first I was concerned and then the guy goes ... "no... it is a zimbone. Very unique etc. and good for the environment etc. etc."  I took the meaning that it was rare, at the time very ahead of its time being environmental, and so on. My assurance had been restored and I was excited to drive the car home. Although then they said something about that it had been previously owned by the "tea party" and that a certain stigma or tax or something odd would always be stuck with this car, no matter who owned it. I didn't like that what ever it was tagged to the car, even though I think it was a savings of some sort. I didn't like that kind of string.

I realized I didn't pack up everything at the hotel and went back to pack the rest. MT, an ex bf was helping with advice about the car. He looked different. His hair was longer a bit and blond. His new wife had bleached it. He said that his neighbors called him a hippy, but he didn't mind. He looked happy. I thought it was silly for him to be helping me, he should be with his wife.

synch, passage, costume

I dreamt that I was on an airplane but needed to get somewhere else. Two older executive ladies walked by saying they are going where I needed to go.  I thought how wonderfully synchronistic. I rant to catch up and talk to them. They helped me and said they would help me get on their plane.

----

I dreamt that I was witnessing a right of passage of some people. They were young, but had facial hair. Part of the ritual included pigs ... I'm not sure if they killed the pigs, but I knew they were part of the ritual. Some other native men were taking large pieces of aloe plants and scraping their insides. Others were sharpening knives. The handles were made of bone or horns maybe. The ritual included scraping the boys faces from all of their hair, leaving their skin a bit raw, then coating it in the aloe.

----

I was with my friend MB. Several of us needed to be in costumes for some reason. MB and I needed to go prepare. We were driving in the snow and I had to park on a hill. I was hoping my car would be ok and turned the wheel so the car would roll to the curb. MB and I got out to go look for and apply make up, but he needed to use the bathroom first. I was not happy that I had to wait again...

TB was dressed as a fairy, a black man was dressed as a shaman...  We were at an outdoor theater stage. It was all of a sudden filled with dancers and colors.

gold bow bomb, pillow ring

I dreamt that I found a gold bow tie. It felt more rigid than it should and I realized it had a bomb or a trigger for a bomb in it. It looked like a bow that I had from childhood that my parents used as uniforms for their restaurant staff. I knew timing was important... this had just been left and the person was departing the building. I decided to click the trigger. I wanted to stop the person from continuing and I wanted this taken care of once and for all, no more tip toeing, no more red tape, let's just do this. I pushed it and nothing happened. I was partly relieved... glad that no one was hurt, no catastrophe happened; partly confused what was this thing that looked like a bomb? I knew it was one, why didn't it go off? was it the wrong timing? did the person escape? I was working with a team of people that were going to find out. It felt good to belong to this team. We relied on each other and believed in each other...

------

I dreamt that RVB called me. I caught mid way through his sentence that he was looking at rings. He saw one that was a ?? something pillow ring. That it wasn't a diamond, but he things I would like it even more. It was unique, special and had meaning.

car memory

I dreamt that I was on a road trip with RVB. It was exciting to be with him but something made me feel doubts, not sure what exactly. We came to a small European town and were going to find a hotel. We parked. He went to go get keys and so on. I got in the car to move it closer and pushed the wrong button. They car had memory buttons and all of a sudden it started going in a direction. I knew it was to his family, his new baby. I wanted to stop it so it wouldn't go, and I wanted to confront him as he said it wasn't an issue and didn't exist anymore for him. My stomach sunk but at the same time I was glad to find the truth sooner rather than later.

folding

I dreamt that I was in a place with Irish people or maybe leprechauns. They were all normal seeming though and my size. We were gathering things to move, all going about our business, as if we were done with a show like a carnival, and now it was time to move on. Everyone was sweet and good mannered and helpful. I had a duvet cover that I was needing to return and if the item looked opened, you would receive a percentage less. I had opened it and was not happy with the way I had folded it. One of the little old men said he could do it easy. He undid my folding job and went to work on it, but it was much worse than what I had done. I appreciated his help but was stressing out. In the mean time 3 people walked by. It seemed as though they were people that were from my high school that I didn't know well, but I knew they would expect me to say hello. I didn't feel like it.

death

I dreamt that I was with some friends. They were going to another's house for fun, I think we were all younger and still living at home. The friend we were visiting had asked for some specific sports glove that I guess was unique. We went to the guy's house to have fun and somehow someone had shot him and he died. We were all scared and worried, not just due to shooting a friend or murder and jail, but the father of this person was very scary. The one who shot him ran to escape and we all ran. I was worried for him. He probably could have been free of being caught, but he kept on the glove that was the friend's and had been seen with it.

Then it melded to another story, but I was still running and escaping something. I was running through peoples' backyards and gardens and would run into a house, and everyone would already be dead. I knew what made them dead was following my path, although I don't think initially it was following me, I was just in the path. It wasn't personal and I wasn't a target. I wanted to get to a home where they people were still alive so I could warn them and/or have them help me stop this thing. I ran up the stairs of one house and it was a Mexican family.  The thing was coming up the stairs behind me. It looked like a man's physique and like a man, but it wasn't. It's face was dry and it was as if his skull was hollow and dry as well. It spoke words as it came up the stairs as if it was a witch. And the people would start dying with his words. He didn't really have to do anything graphic or awful visually, but it felt awful and evil.

I ran from this home and to the next. I was at Oprah's house of all things. I started making breakfast and though I would stop for a bit and eat. But then I didn't want him to catch me or for me to have to run and then leaving her kitchen a mess, so I started cleaning it. Then I had run again. This time he had cornered me. I picked him up by his legs and banged him against the railing of the stairs, the walls, the furniture... nothing affected him, so I kept running.

I know was in a business district and saw a large one story bank with lots of windows and people. I somehow knew he was headed there. I ran to warn the people as well as hoping they would help somehow to stop him. He was right behind me and as I was warning them he put his hand to a monitor screen... somehow that allowed him access to the whole building through electricity. He started with his chant and I thought it was too late. I ran to the end of the building to another exit and as I did I turned to a customer service guy that was sitting at his computer kiosk and smiling. I tilted my head sideways to him and he looked at me and held up an answer. It was a caricature of him, the kind with the very large head and the small body. The drawing had his jaw show as extremely large so that his lower jaw protruded out past the rest of him. In his mouth were all sorts of things that one shouldn't eat - poisons, toxins, batteries, nails and so on, but he had a big grin. The idea being that he could eat anything and not be harmed by it.  He then took a cord from the computer and put it in his mouth, this all while the evil thing was trying to get to everyone via the currents. He was able to stop him and didn't die and the thing lost its power.

coffee time

I dreamt that I was going to get some coffee and read a book. I was sitting in my car and noticed that a friend of mine was in the building next door (FE). He was doing something with his music equipment maybe??  I didn't expect to see him and it kind of made me want to leave or hide for some reason. I looked in my rear view mirror of my car and put on some mascara... tried not to be obvious to him or passers by. I felt a little foolish. Then I went into the coffee place and sat and started reading. The interior was an older building with what seemed like raw wood that had been aged. A little brown, a little black and a little gray with possibly even some white that had been pain that had been stripped. The floors and the walls were all of this wood and it gave it kind of a cozy and quaint feel, but artsy at the same time. I was the only one in there. My desire to avoid him turned into half anxiety and half excitement. Maybe I did want to see him. I noticed the counter person and realized I needed to get some coffee to be sitting there. She didn't mind. 

robots

I dreamt that I was in a building. It felt partly like a home as the insides were a bit cluttered and casual and the people seemed to treat each other warmly. It seems we were packing to move to another building or something along those lines. I went into a back room that held miscellaneous supplies and computer parts. As I was rustling around, I noticed something move. It was computer bits and wires, they were rebuilding themselves. I thought we had destroyed that program long ago, but it seems they had their own mind now and were going to recreate themselves and then destroy us.  I didn't want it to see that I noticed it, so I walked out casually to the others. I had to go outside and turn up some music, as I was afraid they had devices that would pick up on our conversations. Their thoughts were to run, mine was to destroy the building and everything in it. We had to obliterate it and everything we had in there to ensure this couldn't happen. 

song - this little...

Woke up to this song in my head

This little (light) heart of mine, I'm going to let it shine...   (didn't know the words)

not ready

I dreamt that I was possibly traveling. It is hard to say. I know that I was in an inbetween place on the way to somewhere, and needed to keep my things together. It wasn't a place to unpack and it wasn't a place to do anything in particular. I was there with RVB. He and I were on a trip together. He was very enthused and I was wanting to be enthused. His enthusiasm almost felt like it was only for enthusiasm sake and not for the reasons he would give me (which were he and I being together). Or maybe he believed it, but he didn't know the reality, so that is what made me less than enthused. It didn't feel real. I needed to go to the ladies, so I walked away from him to this room. A friend of mine AS (from a class) was there. She always seemed like such a strong willed personality. Gr was there too (from work). We were taking care of things in our suitcases and milling around. I felt like I was the only one that didn't belong. I was milling for milling's sake. I didn't have something I really wanted to look at, but looked to look busy. I didn't really have a reason to be there, but wanted to see what it is I was "supposed" to be doing like a normal person. I think AS could feel it or was disturbed by what she saw wasn't fitting what she felt. I asked her if she was doing to do anything with her Esthetician's license.  She said yes. I was shocked. She hated it. She said that her son was uncomfortable one day, and so she touched a place on his face, his neck and so on and he felt better. She wanted to use it for healing. I had a uncomfortable feeling in my gut. I wasn't upset with her, I was upset with me. It wasn't jealousy, but in a way some form of it.. more that it was mad at myself for not knowing. Why wasn't I "sure" like other people. How could I not know what I want and like like other people?  Gre and AS and I were standing around a table. Organizing our things back in our bags. There was a soft ball type thing in the middle that had lost earrings stuck in it. And then one beautiful square cut crystal was dangling off a string. I wondered why it was there.

RVB came to our room. He was chatting, being completely agreeable, completely enthusiastic, energetic and so on. Why did this annoy me? Maybe it felt like pressure.. I wasn't there and I didn't want to feel like I had to be. But it makes one feel like "what is wrong with me that I am not?"  We had to go. Part of me had wanted to leave much sooner, the other part didn't feel ready.

sesame street - song

Woke up to this song in my head this morning. I don't think I ever knew the words.

Sunny Day
Sweepin' the clouds away
On my way to where the air is sweet

Can you tell me how to get,
How to get to Sesame Street

Come and play
Everything's A-OK
Friendly neighbors there
That's where we meet

Can you tell me how to get
How to get to Sesame Street

It's a magic carpet ride
Every door will open wide
To happy people like you--
Happy people like
What a beautiful

Sunny Day
Sweepin' the clouds away
On my way to where the air is sweet

Can you tell me how to get,
How to get to Sesame Street...

wolf control

I dreamt that someone had a wolf. Hmmm,  it was weird in that this very large wolf was not just someone's dog, it was attached to their soul? or power? or ego?   or???? I'm not sure or maybe it was attached to mine.  They had control over it and I wanted it back because it felt like it was doing things to me that were fear based that I didn't like. So I faced it, not to kill it, but to win it over.

Then later I dreamt that some woman tied up these people horizontally. Like they were on a clothes line but one above the other with space in between. She was torturing them... more like carving out pieces of them.  She was doing it to prove a point to someone else that wasn't being tortured, not to physically hurt them (although she was hurting them). But in the end... it was as though she never really hurt any of them, but one. This person she cooked over a fire. She took the head (again more to hurt another person) and put it on the table and took a knife and sawed through the middle.  The bones were brittle and dry since it had been cooked so long, and you could hear them crack and crunch under the knife. Then she split it in half and served it up to that person.